Pretty pinks.....

This one is for sure a statement piece....I had fun making it...all the pretty pinks

A piece for Fall

Here is a great piece for Fall...

Yummy little treasures, made by me :)

I'm going to start posting pics of some of my jewelry creations....some of these I did a couple of years ago, and have just pulled them out of their tissue paper and boxes, dusted them off, and decided to give them some life again....Perhaps I will try to find a local boutique to sell them at.....

UGH!

ONE MORE DOWN....HOW MANY LEFT TO GO??????????????   UGH!

IF I COULD.....

Just some thoughts of mine lately....

I will call this   IF I COULD

With each thoughtful goodbye
a strength grows within me...
such a painful way to learn,
yet something bigger is in control...

and if I could
I would follow each step you take...
I would submit and let you lead me,
and I know it would be good......

But I cant ignore my heart,
it leads me through this journey...
sometimes I wish I could,
but good isnt always right...

Life is too short, not to listen to the truth...
in the end, it will all make sense,
somehow, someway, without a doubt...
this journey will make perfect sense

If I could.....

Today...

Today I end this purgatory...today I begin a new life...today I embrace strength and power...Today I stop looking back; I only move forward, even on the difficult days...  I will cry when I need to, but only for a short amount of time, then I will wipe away my tears and take a deep breath and let my strength fill me once again.  It's that time again...I can do this :)

5 years ago today...

Five years ago today, I was in the intensive care unit, recovering from brain surgery.  I was probably asleep at this hour 3:23 pm...and probably would have chosen to stay asleep for that first month of recovery...not a fun time.  But here I am, alive and well, five years later...I should use this day to be thankful for my life and my friends and my family.  I should use it to be aware of what is important in life and what really isnt.... easier said than done...

It feels more like it was a life time ago...so strange what life brings our way, seemingly out of the blue.  I will never forget the outpouring of love and care that came my way, from family and friends.  It was a life changing experience, to feel love in that way, and I know I am forever blessed because of it.

Grow and move on...grow and move on...again and again and again...

Just need to come up with the title....

Here it is...I think I love it!

Latest...

Here is my latest work in progress...painting on my piece from my weekend workshop with Tracy Verdugo...trying to remember all the cool things I learned....

Tiny beauty

Just a little vignette of beauty...makes me smile

Venice Beach

Had a lovely day, sitting on the sand at Venice Beach...Being near the ocean always calms me down.  It always makes problems seem so much smaller.  I hope someday to live close to the ocean, so that I can take in her beauty on a regular basis....so wonderful.

Weekend with Tracy Verdugo....

Had an amazing weekend, learning from an incredible artist, that I admire so much!  If you dont know Tracy Verdugo's work, then you really should check it out.  Its just beautiful!   I've admired her art for quite a while now, and this weekend had the privilage of taking her art workshop.  Sometimes it is really difficult to go outside of your creative comfort zone...but so worth it when you do!  I felt like I was "in the zone" all weekend long!  It was awesome!  Here are a couple of pics from my painting, as I went through some of the different stages...I'm not quite sure that I am finished...I think there are a few more changes that need to be made....

!!!

UP AND AT EM!!!!!!

Back in touch....

Going to do something creative today...just to get back in touch with "my reality"....

Please....

Just not sure how long I can keep my happy face and my hope...I feel like I'm losing speed, and I'm getting tired and I want to give up...not even sure what i'm looking for, actually.  I miss the comfort, I miss my feeling of home, I miss being  someone....I miss it all so much...but this is the path I am on...trying so hard to hold on to faith and to hope. .. Just dont know if its really out there or not?  God please be with me, while I am so lost.  Please help me find what I am looking for...
Love, Kelly

Sometimes a new do makes all the difference :)

I got a professional hair coloring and cut today....feeling renewed and ready to take on the world!  haha

...

I'm wide awake...
Falling from cloud nine.....
Born again, out of the lions den....     Roarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!

Just pretty....

Just pretty...thats all....

Learning, growing....

A dear friend shared this with me today...It is perfect...It sums up all I am realizing throughout this difficult year...The words strike me deep inside, almost as if I had written them myself.  Life is amazing...and in its simplest form, so beautiful....

a few seconds ago

• 
  After A While
  
  Veronica A. Shoffstall
  
  After a while you learn
  The subtle difference between
  Holding a hand and chaining a soul
  And you learn that love doesn’t mean leaning
  And company doesn’t always mean security.
  And you begin to learn
  That kisses aren’t contracts
  And presents aren’t promises
  And you begin to accept your defeats
  With your head up and your eyes ahead
  With the grace of a woman
  Not the grief of a child
  And you learn
  To build all your roads on today
  Because tomorrow’s ground is
  Too uncertain for plans
  And futures have a way
  Of falling down in mid flight
  After a while you learn
  That even sunshine burns if you get too much
  So you plant your own garden
  And decorate your own soul
  Instead of waiting
  For someone to bring you flowers
  And you learn
  That you really can endure
  That you are really strong
  And you really do have worth
  And you learn and you learn
  With every good bye you learn.

What I'm working on....

Here's my latest work in progress....

sketch....

just a little sketch tonight...maybe a painting????  I'm not sure....

Hmmmm....

Life just takes you by surprise sometimes...thank God!

...

Sometimes the signs are subtle, and sometimes they are lit up in neon lights, right in front of us.  Its our job  to see them, to recognize them, to find peace in them.

Red Heart Birds....

All fininshed!  Hope you like!

Red Heart Birds
8 x 10
acrylic, ink

what I've been working on....

Here's what I've been working on lately....still in progress.....

The beginnings....

The beginnings of a new chapter....signing the paperwork to buy my new home in Studio City!

Going to do my best to stay positive and balanced and keep counting my blessings :)

Turned a corner....

I've turned a corner...I feel like I may be over the hump, finally!   A few things happened that made me see more clearly.  A few arguements took place and helped me get a better perspective.  I've taken on a new outlook, and I feel ready for it!  I'm a fragile, tough girl...and that is okay with me!  I'm not going to let anything get in my way...I know the sad days will still come around, but I'm not going to let them take me down for very long...I'm going to kick their ass actually!  I'm going to be strong for myself and for my family....just try me!  :)

Red Sparrow

Finished another colorful little birdy painting....
Red Sparrow
8 x 10
Acrylic, Ink

Love Birds Blue

All finished...I'm really pleased with the colors!  Hope you like!
LOVE BIRDS BLUE
8 x 10
Acrylics, Ink

progress....

Some progress....

Beginnings....

In the search of peace and balance, I've started a few new painting projects...here are the beginnings....

Some goodies for the picnic :)

A few goodies for the Fourth of July picnic....I'd much rather paint food, than cook it! ha

Only Today....

Writing can be such a release...I'm doing much better since I wrote all that yuck down in my blog.  Perhaps this life and the sufferings that exist on this earth, will never make sense to me...So I will try to remind myself daily, that there is only today.  I will strive for balance and peace today, only this day.  Then each morning when I wake, that will be my daily goal.  I can do this....  Thank you for your sweet words of encouragement...I know life is difficult for all of us at times.  We cannot change the past, and we cannot control the future.  There is only today :)   Love to you, from me....

a very dark post....

This is going to be a very dark post....

Change....not sure I'm doing so great these days.  Sometimes I think its getting harder, rather than easier.  I thought each day was going to be closer to the end/beginning...but I'm not so sure that is happening.  Everything is empty right now.  Time is moving so so slowly.  When I am alone, time almost stands still and I can barely stand it.

All I feel is the hole in my heart getting bigger and darker.  It feels like hope is drifting away.   Some days the depression sinks in so deeply that it begins to make sense...that scares me.

I keep on seeing this memory in my head...pretty much every day now....it's a horrible memory...

I lived in Taiwan, for 2 1/2 years, in 1995-96. The weather was hot and humid.  It was a very dirty city, trash littered on the roads, and there were so many stray dogs, everywhere.  These dogs roamed the streets.  They were full of disease, some with almost no fur, and open sores.  You could tell that some were dying a very slow death...they would walk around like zombies, even in the open traffic.  It was so hard to see this every day.  The memory that keeps flooding my mind is this... A car is parked on the side of the road, and the traffic and people walk by, going about their everyday business.  Under the car is a female dog, in heat.  She is huddled, alone, under the center of the car.  Surrounding the car are about 10 male dogs, maybe more...they are all in a frenzy to mate with her.  They are sick and hungry and tired and hot, and so is she.  But she is scared, and trying to keep away from them...but one by one, they take turns, sometimes fighting with each other to get to her.  There is nothing she can do, but endure each rape.  And it just goes on and on.

It is one of the most painful memories I have...and there was nothing I could do to help her.  And lately this memory keeps haunting me...I cry when I write this and I cried when I saw this...
I just dont understand life anymore...and it seems it keeps confusing me more and more....

Sweetness for the nursery

Another set for my nursery portfolio....