Sometimes words are everything and sometimes they are nothing. Sometimes its best to stay silent and just be patient. God knows what is going on even when we dont. Keeping the faith that he is in charge and that everything will be okay, that is the challenge for me. Being alone and not knowing what the future holds is a difficult position to be in... its not a choice. When things are not right I can feel it in my heart. I cannot pretend, I can only be open to what I feel...even when nothing makes sense. That is the hardest part for me; when I feel the pain of loss and of loneliness. I want so badly to do the easiest thing, but I know that would only make things feel better temporarily. There would be no healing, no changes, no security, no peace.