Happy New Year!

Happy New Year!  Here's wishing you a wonderful 2012, full of love and peace and joyfull moments that fill your heart!   Love from me and my littlest Love....

A perfect quote...

I read this quote this morning, and thought is was so perfect....Happy New Year everyone!  God Bless us all....

"May your coming year be filled with magic and dreams and good madness. I hope you read some fine books and kiss someone who thinks you're wonderful, and don't forget to make some art - write or draw or build or sing or live as only you can. May your coming year be a wonderful thing in which you dream both dangerously and outrageously.I hope you'll make something that didn't exist before you made it, that you will be loved and you will be liked and you will have people to love and to like in return. And most importantly, because I think there should be more kindness and more wisdom in the world right now - I hope that you will, when you need to be, be wise and that you will always be kind. And I hope that somewhere in the next year you surprise yourself" ~ Neil Gaiman

Almost finished....

Well this one is getting there...it's almost finished...but not quite yet....

A beautiful quote....

A beautiful quote I will hang on to....
‎"And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." {Anais Nin}

3:09 am

Falling....3:09am

Falling, but gently...
Floating, weightlessly, like a feather...
Gently drifting back and forth like a leaf dropping from a tree...
Peacefully, like there is no gravity....
Calmly, enjoying each new sensation....
Slowly, with no concept of time or space...
Sweet and Lovingly,  with a pure heart...
Innocently, with an open mind...
Letting go...and trusting...and falling....

Its coming along....

Some more progress....

Some progress....

I've been working on this for a couple of hours now....Here's what it looks like now....

Beginning another painting....

Well, today was a better day...I joined the gym.  I even worked out!  AND...I started another painting....

I know if I keep taking the positive steps, even if I feel like I'm faking it, things will begin to get better.  That is my plan... I will just keep taking steps...one after the other :)

Yesterday...

Yesterday was a very dark day for me.  I'm trying to go with the flow...feeling sad, when it hits me and feeling happy when those days come.  I've been busy building my family unit for the last 22 years.  I've been busy growing up and being a Mother and a wife.  It has been my identity for 22 years...

Now I am lost....I dont know where I belong anymore.  I am still a Mother, that will always be a huge part of my identity...but there needs to be more.  I have faith that I will find where I belong, but in the mean time I feel like I am in limbo.  I feel lost and am not quite sure what to do with myself.  I have moments of pitch black darkness, that hit me like a wave.  They make me wish to be done with this life on earth.  They make me wish for my heart to stop beating.  They make me wish that I could just float away, back to home...But I know that is not possible.  My children need me, and I would never leave them.  I know we have so many wonderful moments in our future...I'm holding on to those moments with every breath I take.

I'm writing all of this, so that I may release it from my heart.  I know it is dark and ugly, but it is the truth...the very simple truth.  Today I will get dressed.  Today I will sign up for a membership at 24 hour fitness.  Today I will take a positive step forward.  Today I will let my sadness sit, while I put myself on auto pilot and do what I know I must do to get better.  Today I will push through the dark, and find the light anyways...

ESCAPE

Well, I think its all finished.   I'm calling this piece ESCAPE
Hope you like....it's a bit different for me, but I'm happy with how it turned out.

Escape
Acrylic
18 x 24

A beautiful quote....

Just wanted to share this beautiful quote....
"Saying yes, opening up, and loving:  these are the keys that will unlock the prison door."

Arnaud Desjardins

still working on it....

more changes, not sure about the drops....its fun for me to keep moving with this one-I have no clue how it will turn out.  :)

still changing....

It keeps morphing....

still progressing....

a little more....

A little more progress....

the beginnings of a new painting....

Started a new painting last night.....

my thoughts....

Who knew life could be so complicated?  I have faith that the darkest times are when our souls  have the most opportunities to grow.  I do believe that  pain and struggles lead us to peace and enlightenment.  Logically, I know these facts to be true,  but it is so hard when things feel off.  It's like time slows down, and the pain is felt longer...why must it hurt so much to grow?  Why is it so hard to hold on to the hope, when it is dark?  How is it that the darkness can make everything feel so unfamiliar?  How is it that the most simple, human need...to feel loved, can be such a difficult thing to attain?

These are some of my thoughts for today, as I try to make sense of my current situation.  These are some of my questions, as I try to hold on to faith and hope.

One step forward....

Hi friends....
I've been gone for a bit...not gone physically, but gone emotionally.  I'm still a little "gone" right now, but I'm taking a step forward.  I havent really painted in over a month.  That can't be good.  Creating is therapy for me...it always has been and I know it will be this time too.  Last night I decided to turn my dining room into my art studio.  I thought that for me, right now, it would be best to put what is most healthy for me, right in front of me...does that make sense????   I need my painting to be a part of my everyday life again...I've missed it so much, in so many ways.

Here is my little sanctuary...here is where I plan to do much of my healing...here is where I plan to feel peace :)

When I started my blog...it was to be my diary of my art and my life.  I am an open person, and to me it felt good to share my story-the good and the bad...but recently I have stopped sharing.  I have been struggling inside.  I have been worrying more about others interpreting my words...but you know what?  My blog is mine and my words and feelings are mine.  I believe in sharing our stories with each other.  I believe that only good can come from sharing the truth.  My hope in sharing my story is that it may help one person get through something that they may be going through, by not feeling so alone in this world.  So today I am promising myself that I will begin again.  I will let my feelings flow out of me and into my blog.  I will live my truth, and let my heart feel free again.    Today I am making one big step forward, and tomorrow I will make another.  This I promise myself.

Happy Holidays

Happy Holidays friends.  Wishing you all peace and joy this holiday season!  Love, Kelly

My baby girl....

Nineteen years ago today, at 1:45 am, my beautiful baby girl was born.  She was a tiny little thing at 5 lbs, 1 oz.  She was determined to come into this world early-exactly 1 month early!   She was a force, the second she entered this world, with strong, tiny little lungs that filled the hospital with her bold cries.  She was beautiful on arrival and has only continued to grow more beautiful every single day.  She is my pride and joy, my daughter and friend.  I am so very blessed to be her Mama.

She will always be my little princess <3

I love her adventurous spirit!

And underneath all that indepence, lies a loving, compassionate heart.   Yes...I am blessed.

Published!!!!

Hey friends...I have a little piece published in the Winter 2012 Somerset Studio Gallery!!!!  So fun!  Here's a peek....

Here's me on page 68....

Tiles....

These are some tiles that I made a few years ago.  They are 4 x 4 inches.  Just stone tiles that I got at the hardware store.  I inked them up to age them a bit, collaged them and finished them with bees wax.  Just found these pics, so I thought I'd post them....

Hello....

Hello sweet blog friends.  I'm wishing you all a wonderful holiday season, full of love and gratefulness.

I havent been blogging much lately...my life is a little bit upside down at the moment.  I am going through a separation from my husband of 22 years.  There is not alot of drama that is the reason for this big change, just life I guess.  Anyway, we are still friends and hopefully will remain that way forever.  When I get settled and am feeling like myself again, I will be back to posting and sharing my artwork with you lovely angels in my life. :)  

Wishing you all a joyous and peaceful holiday.  

Love,
Kelly

Day 10 of gratitude....

On this 10th day of gratitude, I am thankful for my creative passion.  It is and has always been my saving grace.  It gives me such peace when times are bad.  It gives me confidence in myself and who I am.  It calms me and helps me see more clearly.  Oh I am so very thankful for this passion.

Made by our own little hands....

Today I am grateful for all things made by hand.  There is so much beauty in something that is carefully crafted by human hands.  The slight imperfections and uniqueness make it that much more beautiful.  A painting, a crafted product, a piece of jewelry is so amazing to me because there is not another one exactly like it.  When ever I finish a painting, I think to myself that this thing in front of me didn't even exist until I created it!  There is not another one like it anywhere on this earth...that sort of blows me away!  Life can become so boring when everything is so cookie cutter, right off the assembly belt.  Yes...I am thankful for creations made by our own hearts and hands.





Erics beautiful jewelry

Enjoy the ride....

A dear friend sent this link to me this morning.  I watched it with tears welling up in my eyes.  I intend to watch it many more times and soak in the messages.  Wonderful words to live by for all of us.
Enjoy the ride...

On my lap....

On my lap this morning........What a wonderful way to start my day!  Happy Sunday friends :)

Sometimes....

Sometimes things need to fall apart, in order to be built up again.  Sometimes people need to break, in order to heal and be stronger.  Change is good and necessary and part of life.  I have faith that there are reasons beyond what we can comprehend at the time, but that someday the reasons will become clear.

If there was no dark, there would be no light...no rain, no rainbows...no change, no butterflies.

I have faith that we will all fly again.

 I am listening with an open heart.  I will keep my faith and stay in the light.  I will heal and grow and fly again.

I have faith and I have hope.  For now that is all I need.

She Found Peace

SHE FOUND PEACE
16 x 20
Mixed media, acrylic, ink, collage

Heading out for some art....

Tomorrow I'm heading out to California for the weekend and I'm sooooooo excited!   I'll be taking a painting class from the incredible, Flora Bowley!  Her work is beautiful...so full of color and imagination!   When I look at her work, I feel like a little kid in a candy store, overwhelmed for a second as I soak it all in, then just not sure where to begin!  I really love her creations.  I love the way they look and I love the feeling they evoke in me.  I'll take lots of pics to share.  I know it will be magical!

Hearing Aids for me!!!!

So today was the big day!  I had my hearing aid appointment!!!!!  These tiny little things are amazing!  They are from a company called Phonak and they aren't really hearing aids, but more of a hearing system for single sided deafness.  Here is what they do:   The one on my left ear (my deaf ear) has a reciever on it, so it picks up the sounds on my left side that I would normally not hear.  It takes the sounds into its reciever and  instantly sends them to the piece in my right ear.  That one then takes the recording and plays it into my right ear (my hearing ear)!   So now it feels like I hear in both ears!  And it adjusts itself to different background noises and such, so that I get the best quality hearing.  I just think its amazing!  I'm still not able to locate a sound, but this will help me so much when I am in stores or restarants or anywhere where there are lots of people or noises.  I'm really excited about this.  Here are a couple of pictures from today.

This is what they look like.  The red one is for my right ear and the blue one is for the left.  You cant even see them when I have them on.  Technology just blows me away!

I'm a happy girl!

Progress....

A little more progress tonight on my latest.....

Also.....drum roll please......only THREE more days till I get my hearing aids!!!!!!!!  I'll keep ya posted and in the loop!